Me: "Are you a hater?"
Telemarketer: "Is this Michael?"
Me: "Haterz keep hatin'."
Telemarketer (chuckle masking confusion): "Hello Michael, this is Darnell with NeedlessShit Enterprises. How are we doing today?"
Me: "Oh you know, just shakin' these haterz off my back left and right like a dog with fleas, nah mean?"
Telemarketer: "That's, uhhh...that's...good to hear? I'm calling to offer you a special promotion on a skin care line you said you were interested in on of our affiliate websites a while back."
Me: "What website was that? Haterz.com? I don't visit them sites. I got a hater blocker on my firewall, you dig?"
Telemarketer: "It was a while ago, so you might have forgotten about it. It's a revolutionary new skin care line that offers the finest salves and lotions made with 100% natural ingredients."
Me: "Wait...are you hatin' on me?"
Telemarketer: "Excuse me?"
Me: "Why you gotta hate, Darnell?! I'm just doin' mah thang thang and you all up in my grill hatin' all over mah shit with a hatergram."
Telemarketer: "Sir, I just wanted to offer you a risk free trial so you could try these products you're interested in before you buy them, that's all."
Me: "I'm sorry, Darnell. It's just that all these haterz keep tryin' to stop mah hustle and I got a thick skin for that shit these days. It be like shootin' at Superman. They be spittin' them hater bullets and I be all like 'PING! PING!'"
Telemarketer: "If you give me your address, I can get these products out to you right away."
Me: "I don't need none a dat hater cum in a bottle, Darnell. Whatchu want? You want me to dump all that congealed hater cum all over mah tits and give me a hater rash?! I already TOLD you I was 'llergic to dat hater bizness. You a busted ass hater, Darnell."